In the third chapter of the book, Equipped: Smart Catholic Parenting in a Sexualized Culture, we read about the first wall of the house, our God-given identity. We are unique and unrepeatable people. We are made in the image and likeness of God. We are sons and daughters of God.
“God is love,” as we read in the first letter of St. John. God is eternal, which means that He didn’t have a beginning but has always existed, and that He won’t have an end, or stop existing. But, if God is eternal, how can God also be love. Love has to be shared with another or given away. Before God created the universe He was alone, wasn’t He? No, God wasn’t alone, because God is a Trinity, and the Trinity is an eternal exchange of love. Before time began, the Father has been pouring Himself out in a total gift of love to the Son, and the Son has been receiving the Father’s love and pouring Himself back out to the Father, and they have both been pouring themselves out to the Holy Spirit. God is a relationship, a perfect sharing of love. We are destined to share in the eternal, perfect love of God. That is the reason that we were made, and that is what it means to be made in the image and likeness of God. The first wall of the house is to make sure that you and your children understand this. We all we know about religion is the rules, the “thou shalt not’s,” then we’re doomed to failure. We have to understand God’s love for us and that we are destined for the same love. Our job on earth is to love and serve God by living in His love and by loving one another as He has loved us.
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The second chapter of Equipped is “The Blueprint.” Most of the chapter is taken up with a summary of what we’ll see in the rest of the book, but it starts off with a brief explanation. It says that the book is modeled after a home, with the chapters being the walls, roof, and floor of the home. They chose to do this because the home is the Domestic Church. This is a term taken from the 2nd Vatican Council, from the document Lumen Gentium. Lumen Gentium has this to say about the family:
"Finally, Christian spouses, in virtue of the sacrament of Matrimony, whereby they signify and partake of the mystery of that unity and fruitful love which exists between Christ and His Church, help each other to attain to holiness in their married life and in the rearing and education of their children. By reason of their state and rank in life they have their own special gift among the people of God. From the wedlock of Christians there comes the family, in which new citizens of human society are born, who by the grace of the Holy Spirit received in baptism are made children of God, thus perpetuating the people of God through the centuries. The family is, so to speak, the domestic church. In it parents should, by their word and example, be the first preachers of the faith to their children; they should encourage them in the vocation which is proper to each of them, fostering with special care vocation to a sacred state (LG 11)." Married people have a special calling, or mission, from God, which they agree to when they make their vows before God. That mission is to help their family to get to heaven by growing in holiness, by loving one another sacrificially, and by raising their children in the faith. It says that parents should be “the first preachers of the faith to their children,” by word and example. Notice that it doesn’t say that the Church, or the priest, or the religion teacher is the first preacher of the faith, it says the parents are. Parents have a unique role and relationship with their children. We learn about what is truly important in life from our parents. Every child, as they grow into an adult, has to choose for themselves what is going to be most important in their life and whether to live the faith or not, but what you say to them, and more importantly what you show them, can prepare them to make those decisions. If they look at your life and how you spend your time will they see that your relationship with God is very important, or not very important at all? This is my first blog post about Equipped, I hope to post about 1 chapter each week, usually on Wednesdays.
My paw paw used to tell us a story about a group of scholars working for an emperor. The emperor charged them with collecting all human knowledge; so the scholars worked for ten years collecting copies of all the books and manuscripts in the world. The collection was so large that it filled up an entire palace. After the ten years were up, the Emperor came and saw the collection, and said that it was too much. They would have to reduce the size of the collection. So the scholars worked for another 10 years going through the tomes and manuscripts, getting rid of repeated information and useless books, until the collection could fit into a building the size of a mansion. But this was still too large to the Emperor. So, they worked for another 10 years until it was could fit into a large room, but this was still too large, so they kept working. Then one day, the Emperor came to check on his scholars, and found the room empty of books. The head scholar came up to the Emperor and handed him a slip of paper. The paper said, “There ain’t no free lunch.” In the first chapter of the book that we gave out after Mass a few weeks ago, Equipped: Smart Catholic Parenting in a Sexualized Culture, you can read that some studies show that, in the Millennial Generation, 79% of men and 76% of women say that the view pornography at least once a month. More disturbing than that, though, is that some people think pornography is actually good for society. This shouldn’t be surprising, since sexuality is one of the most powerful human passions, and we live in a highly sexualized culture where pornography is available for “free” on thousands, if not tens of thousands. We all know from personal experience, however, that nothing is free, everything has a price. Heavy use of pornography can be damaging for anyone, although this will be different for everyone. When we view pornography, we train ourselves to view other people as objects of sexual gratification, instead of as people with human dignity. Just like we don’t want other people to view us as a means to get something for themselves, so we shouldn’t treat others that way. Human sexuality was given to us by God as a way for husbands and wives to express their total love for one another. Love is concerned for what I can do for you, whereas lust is concerned with what you can do for me. When someone views pornography, it becomes very easy to stop thinking of them as people at all, but as objects, and we don’t want to train ourselves to do that. During this season of Lent, and as we go through the rest of this book, let’s pray that God will help us to learn more about the dangers of pornography, grow in the virtue of chastity, and become better at controlling our desires so they don’t control us. |
AuthorFr. Bryan was pastor of Our Lady of Lourdes from July 3, 2017 to June 2022. Categories
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